What she said.

yeah.

I thought I should say this

It's the end of the semester here in the land of New Yorkers. Keith and I are currently working our butts off trying to make the grade and graduate from college.

Therefore we will be on hiatus for a week or two as we sort out our finals and whatnot.

I apologize in advance to anyone who is interested in our site.

Thank you,

Management

Good-bye Gorillaz.

This is my first post after switching to Mozilla Firefox. It's so much better than Safari. Wow.

But anyway, here's a bit of sad news courtesy of Spin.com. Gorillaz leader and musical renaissance man Damon Albarn annouced that the group will no longer be making pop records.

It's a shame because I really like Gorillaz. Their records are a lot of fun. And after watching their live DVD performance of Demon Days I decided that one of my life goals is to start what I like to call a Superband.

A Superband is a group of musicians (usually between 9-20) that get together to write pop songs that could just as well be played by a normal sized rock band. However, when it's a huge group, those songs become absolutely epic. For example: Broken Social Scene, Arcade Fire, World Inferno Friendship Society. And the list goes on.

My reasoning is this: Performing with a band is always great but how can you not have fun playing music when every single time you have a performance there is a party on the stage? That many people all going nuts and playing loud must be a blast.

But there is always a core to these groups - that is, the person who puts it all together and makes it happen. And if you watch the Demon Days DVD you'll notice that Mr. Albarn hides in the shadows for most the show.

He's modest and he's just trying to give the other performers the attention they deserve. Also, the silhouetted band leader looks so cool as he rocks out in the back of the stage at his piano. When he does come out though, it's to perform "Hong Kong" and this is one of those moments where your jaw drops and you stand frozen, understanding all the while that you're witnessing something special. The word is "poignant." Just watch:



This is why Damon Albarn is so cool.

So I'm not REALLY sad that Gorillaz are not making any more records because they've ended on a high note as far as I'm concerned. And it's not like Albarn is going to stop playing music.

Now, what's this about a Blur reunion?

Do I have to instate a retraction?

I was reading NME.com, and this headline came up.

Sum 41 name new album
Their first new material since 2004

Now if you remember in my Avril Lavigne article, I wrote about how Avril's husband's, Deryck of Sum 41, band sucked and they weren't making any music. Well, I was wrong. Apparently, they are releasing it in July 23. The album is called Underclass Hero. Now, is that a reference to the underclassmen students or just an underclassmen of the world.

You know, underclass. Oh wait, maybe I mean the lowerclass. Either way, some sort of underdog effect is probably going to ensue and we will have to listen to an entire album filled with teenage angst. I mean, if Sum 41 isn't fueling the generations of acne-faced teeangers, then who will? Blink 182? Are they going to get back together and record a studio album? I hope to God they don't.

The self-produced effort was recorded in Los Angeles at Ocean Way, and is the band's first new material since the departure of guitarist Dave Baksh.

So they're also getting rid of the one minority in the group. So it's like Buddy Holly. All white people. Woot Canada!!

Radiohead reissue and a rant about piracy

On NME.com, Radiohead has announced the release of their reissue Com Lag (2+2=5).

The EP was originally released in Japane and Australia in 2004. It will be reissued in the UK on April 16 and the US on May 8.

If you're a good Radiohead fan, then you've probably downloaded a copy on some illegal pirating site. Sadly, we (or more I) don't promote that type of thing on supercoolawesomeradyeah. I think music should be physical. None of that "mystical jukebox" bullcrap. I think it's all baloney that music only exists in the form of an mp3. What about albums? What about cds? Hell, what about cassettes?

I feel sort of like a hypocrite since I do download my music online, but it's legitimate. I'm paying a percentage to those lonely musicians who have dreamed since childhood to make music their careers. If they can't make a profit, then it's like you working for your pathetic retail job you hate so much for free. Now, do you want that?

Music should be a source fo collection. Like books or dvds, we should collect music like that. I have to hand it to iTunes and the Apple corporation for creating a product that will reduce the number of cds you carry in your bag drastically, but being able to go home and pop a cd into your stereo and blasting the music sounds so much better than listening to it through your mp3 player.

I don't know. That's just me. Let's get back to Radiohead. Here's the tracklisting for their reissue of Com Lag (2+2=5):

'2+2=5'
'Remyxmomatosis (Cristian Vogel RMX)'
'I Will (Los Angeles Version)'
'Paperbag Writer'
'I Am A Wicked Child'
'I Am Citizen Insane'
'Skttrbrain (Four Tet Remix)
'Gagging Order'
'Fog (Again) (Live)'
'Where Bluebirds Fly'
'2+2=5 (Live At Belfort Festival)'

Enjoy!

Do you remember Tiny Bubbles?

Don Ho died last Monday.

Yeah, I don't know who he is either. I had to look up online googling his name and went to his website. Then I heard that song:

Tiny Bubbles.

So a week later, I start to write blogs again and I find out that a thriller of hearts in Hawaii has died. Apparently he was not only know for this song, but also for some raspberry colored shades he used to don (ho).

He died of heart failure at the age of 76. That's pretty young. Billboard Online also says that he underwent some stem cell research for his heart. I guess in times like these, people like Don Ho should survive. He's a memory of peace and health. Keeping things together by keeping everyone drunk.

If you don't know Don Ho, then you know that Tiny Bubbles song. I think I heard this song once while watching a movie or something, but I just remember it somehow.

Now the coolest thing about Don Ho and Tiny Bubbles is that no matter where you are, you are in Hawaii. It's probably up there with "Aloha Oi'" or however you spell that. The relaxing verberation of the sliding guitar and the slowness of the entire song makes me want to unwind on a beach chair during sunset drinking some fruity alcohol. Oh yes, how much I do want to go to Hawaii now.

I couldn't find any videos of his song because, well, I think that song was created before the time of videos. So here are a few videos of people singing it. I love how it just equates to Hawaii. That's the greatest. Move over Elvis, this is the real Blue Hawaii

Rest in Peace, Tiny Bubbles (Don Ho).

So it goes.

Kurt Vonnegut is dead.

We all need to sit and think about this for a moment. I'll write it again.


Kurt Vonnegut is dead.

It's funny. My first thought after reading the CNN article? His book sales are going to go through the roof. So I guess the answer is no - it still hasn't really sunk in yet.

In today's world, what passes for real is becoming increasingly less like the the dictionary definition of the word. I like Vonnegut because I feel like his work shows me something more real than real. It's unfiltered and it's honest. Vonnegut does not bullshit. He works through a lens that catches the real things we ought to be angry about in the world, and he presents his anger in the most human way possible.

Like many people, my first experience with Vonnegut was Slaughterhouse Five. My high school English teachers made us read it and I'm really glad they did. From that point on I was one of the maybe four or five people who regularly took books out of the library. They had most of his novels in paperback so each week I'd borrow a new one. Vonnegut became one of the great educators of my life in that with each turn of his pages, he trained the critical eye that most of my school teachers were failing to show me how to use. The characters and the feelings felt so real (even when they were absurd, or fantastical) that it all felt personal. I never met the man, but if I had I'd have told him that I would not have the brain I have got without him.

I don't know what else to write. This is just awful. But when authors die, their book sales skyrocket. I'm pretty sure this is a fact written down somewhere in something like "The Book of Things That Happen and Will Always Happen." So if his passing means that more people are going to be affected by his work, then I guess there is no better gift he could have given the world.

Rest in peace, Mr. Vonnegut. And if they happen to have blogs wherever you are, and you happen to read this, then just know that I would not have the brain that I have got if not for you.

The best place to hold political forum.

In this poignant political song, Electric Six take us deep inside the inner thoughts of two of our world leaders. With all this talk about Iran and U.S. border control, it's good to know that our wonderful president and his friend the prime minister still know how to have a good time.



[Thanks to Matt for pointing this one out to me.]

M.I.A: Why Am I Not Surprised?

On NME.com, MIA has just released information about her new album due in June. It will be produced with the help of Diplo and (you guessed it) Timbaland.

Why does Timbaland keep on getting gigs. First, it was the United States. Now he's infiltrating the United Kingdom?

I don't get it. Either way, MIA is doing pretty well with a new single called Bird Flu. I haven't heard it yet, but you can check it out on her myspace page.

NOTE: If you're prone to seizures, then you'll definitely get one looking at either her myspace or her webpage.

Air Sex?

I'm not entirely sure what to make of this. Everyone knows that when you are lonely, you can reach depths of emotional dispair that are difficult to come back from. Often, these feelings manifest themselves in perverse and sometimes embarrassing behavior. And I suppose in today's world it is only a matter of time before someone turns it into performance art:

This is probably one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my entire life. Air sex. Sex with air. Maybe it'll scare you a little bit - make you wonder about just how low the human spirit can actually go? I'm personally more afraid of the idea that has begun to haunt me since I first watched this video: that joke or no joke, this could actually catch on.

And then it's only a matter of time before we get something like Air Sex Hero on the Nintendo Wii. I'm sure they'd be able to work to do something like
with a few quick moves on one of these bad boys:



You can see it now, can't you?

[Thanks to Random Good Stuff for pointing it out.]

Avril Lavigne: A Confusing Mix of Skulls and Pink

Lately, Avril Lavigne has been buzzing around again with the release of her new album The Best Damn Thing. She's released a new single called Girlfriend, which by pop music standards really apply. She got married to the perfect punk-rock leadman Deryck Whibley of Sum 41 in the most elaborate of wedding ceremonies in California. She actually wore white, not pink.

Now, back from her marriage hiatus, Avril Lavigne forces down that Canadian voice to be the breadwinner between the couple (sorry Deryck but your band sucks).

Let's talk about a few things:

1. Her new album: I don't want to be a baby about these things, but life really hasn't been complicated for Avril. Her new album, which is aptly named "The Best Damn Thing" probably won't be. I haven't heard it, yet I don't have my doubts that it will be better than Let Go or that other one. With song titles like Hot or One of Those Girls, I'm sure Avril has brought teenage angst to an artform. Well, to a really shitty artform. Like one of those weird paintings that you have to put your nose up to see it. Hidden images. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

2. Her new single: Um. What happened? Where is that angsty girl who fucks up the displays in shopping malls? Where is the tie-wearing, eye makeup-smudging, crazy sk8er-boi loving teenager from five years ago? Did she finally grow up to play those kinky, half-dressed pop stars she so desperately tried to dispell? The song...is not so bad. The lyrics, of course, are in the style that Avril Lavigne has enjoyed writing since her first album: bad. Easy rhyming schemes and catchy melodies, it's basically the formula for a hit. However, this isn't some normal hit song. This is the song the cheerleading squad will use for their next big championship. This is the song for girls who are bored and want to dance like an idiot in their room. This is the song at the Roller Rink (if there are any left) that plays during birthday parties for 12-year-olds. No matter how old Avril gets, her fans seem to get younger.

3. Her new music video: Well, she likes pink and she likes skulls. That's basic when you watch the video. What's also prevalent is her tiny plaid skirt dawned with a pink wifebeater and back-up dancers. She makes fun of the girls who are bimbos (yet again) to try and get the sk8er-guy (not boi). Why does this all sound so similiar? Perhaps it was the same premise as in Sk8er Boi except it's not a skater. It's some dude who probably smokes up in his room and plays a mean guitar when he's baked or some variation. But you're in love and you hate his damned stoner girlfriend for providing him with the weed. If only he could quit drugs and fall so head-over-heels in love with you. Boo. Hoo.

Well, at least this time she's got sex appeal? I'm not even sure about that either. What I'm definitely sure of is that Avril Lavigne leans towards the hip and popular rather than the uncool and the people who hang out by the pretzel stand at the mall. You're so complicated! Ugh!

Robert Smith and Ashlee Simpsons...why God why?

Reportedly on EW.com, Ashlee Simpson will be collaborating with Robert Smith of the Cure for a new single.

Hold up.
Hold the damn phone!

Two incredibly different talents (Robert Smith from the Cure, Ashlee Simpson being a disgrace to the plastic surgery profession) are going to get together in a studio and "lay down some beats"? This news probably came out a few days ago, but I thought everyone should know the blasphemy. A contributor of the 80's music decade is going to get with a girl whose only connection to the 80's was that she was born then?

I mean, I remember when Ashlee Simpsn was trying her hardest to be "punk rock," and "not giving in to the pop hype like her sister Jessica Simpson," but let's face it. I mean, let's FACE it. With her new face and her new style of music, Ashlee Simpson has definitely taken her idea of rebelling against pop culture and thrown it out the window. Then she raised it to an artform.

New face, new career, new Mary-Kate Olsen.
I feel like vomitting. That's all I can say.

Dick Dale's Deal.

Now here is something interesting. Surf Rock guitarist Dick Dale was asked what advice he would give to aspiring musicians.
It sounds like very good advice - and it would in fact leave your integrity intact, jack.

However, I'm not so sure that Mr. Dale takes into account just how difficult it is to become noticed by people like Nissan or Mountain Dew without the right amount of clout. And depending on where you live, grassroots build-up might not be enough to get that attention. Thankfully the internet makes the world a whole lot smaller.

I thought this was an interesting thing to post considering all the stuff going on with EMI and iTunes. Even though the sale of digital media just got a lot better, artists are still going to be on the losing end of the deal. More money will be charged for their songs and yet they probably won't receive one cent above what they previously got. At least not yet, anyway. It seems that Dale's advice (even if it isn't exactly the newest idea) is becoming more relevant with each day.

If you don't know about it already then check out this website: CD Baby. You can start your own store, sell your cd, and even get your music onto itunes for digital download. Though I'm not entirely sure if indie music even gets DRMs loaded onto them and I don't know if people will be able to buy higher quality recordings of indie music either.

Another place you can go is here: Stolen Radio. They're trying to get the same kind of deal going. Artists can sell their digital music through the store.

Brilliant.

[Thanks to Boing Boing for pointing out the Dale interview]

I've Been Tired... In school.

Ok. I very rarely remember my dreams but I just woke up from one of the most bizarre/cool ones I have ever had.

So - I am back in my 8th grade classroom, writing down a secret note that I stuffed in a miniature manilla envelope. I pass the note to the kid in front of me when the teacher isn't looking (she is quietly walking around making sure everyone is doing classwork in silence). He takes the note from me and reads it and the next thing you know I hear something come out of the the kid two seats behind me. He goes:

One two three
She's a real left winger 'cause she been down south
And held peasants in her arms
She said "I could tell you a story that could make you cry"
"What about you?"
I said "Me too"

Well, I never look back at the kid, but in my dream it's sort of understood that he's an 8th grade Charles Thompson, AKA as Black Francis, AKA Frank Black of the Pixies - pounding out the drum beat of the song on his desk. Lord knows where the guitar is coming from. And by the time he reaches the chorus, the little girl behind him comes in shouting:

I've been tired! I've been tired! I've been tired!

A little Kim Deal. Awesome!

Class and teacher stand amazed, and a little angry. I decide that this is "punk rock" at its finest. I am also convinced in my dream that this must be the original performance that is heard on the recording of the song that is used on the record Come On Pilgrim. Well, it isn't.

It's just my dream. But here's the real one in all it's glory.

Pixies - I've Been Tired

Just be careful how many times you listen to the record or you might end up with some uninvited visitors in your sleep. Though, maybe if it's these guys that's not such a bad thing.

Keep in mind, I didn't even know who the Pixies were in 8th grade but I have now decided that my children absolutely will. And as for what secret note was in the manilla envelope... it was whatever this guy says:

Whoa Whoa Whoa

Keith Richards, the guitarist of the band the Rolling Stones, has admitted yesterday to snorting his father's ashes with some coke when he died.

This quote was found in the interview Richards did with NME.com

The strangest thing I've tried to snort? My father. I snorted my father. He was cremated and I couldn't resist grinding him up with a little bit of blow. My dad wouldn't have cared," he said. "... It went down pretty well, and I'm still alive."

Um. Ew. Understandable that you love the man. I mean, he's one half of the reason you're alive, Keith. But seriously. Did you need to go to the measures of snorting him. He will be with you...in spirit. I don't think your family and friends meant that he would actually be IN you. Way to go, Keith. You just improved on the name "Rock Star." Geez.

Bumbershoot: Only in Seattle

Bumbershoot, a three-day festival of music and art in Seattle, has just released a new bunch of performers for the 2007 season. The list of acts can be officially found on the Bumbershoot website, but Billboard.com has an exclusive to the number of add-ons to the festival:

The Shins
The Wu-Tang Clan
Panic! At The Disco
The reformed Crowded House
Lupe Fiasco
Steve Earle
Devotchka
Devendra Banhart
Roky Erickson
Allison Moorer
Magnolia Electric Company
Gogol Bordello
Kill Hannah
Norma Jean
Plain White T's
the Gourds
Lyrics Born
the Holmes Brothers.

This is a small list of bands that are going to perform. I think it will get bigger once it gets closer to the dates. What's really interesting is that it's a mixture of hip-hop, rock, metal, and jew rock? I'm surprised they don't have Matisyahu or Balkan Beatbox on the menu as well.

There can't be a better way to end the summer with some really good music at a large festival in Seattle. Hell, I'll probably go.

OH-EM-GEE! I just heard the craziest thing about...

Today's edition of Rollingstone.com features an article on the best rumors in rock and roll. Many of them are common knowledge like

24. Robert Johnson sold his soul to the devil in exchange for his guitar-playing gifts.

Some are rediculous:

10. Gene Simmons had a cow tongue grafted onto his own tongue after a car accident.

And some of them are absolute gems.

For example, did you know that

7. Jim Morrison was killed by members of the Nixon administration/faked his own death/died from a heart attack brought on by masturbating in a Parisian bathtub.

I didn't know that. I think that I'm going to stick with the idea that the Nixon administration did him in and consequently, did the world a favor. This way we can all agree that it didn't like talentless, fat and lewd rock grandpas either.

Or how about this one:

11. Rod Stewart/Lil’ Kim/Jordan Knight had to get their respective stomachs pumped after ingesting a gallon of semen.

Ok... so dying when you're 27, yes. Sleeping with as many groupies as possible, sure. Saying "Thank you Cleveland!" when you're actually in Philly, of course. But I was unaware that guzzling down man-juice was a rite of passage in the world of rock and roll. So let's give a sticky hand to these pioneers. Bravo, Rod Stewart/Lil’ Kim/Jordan Knight! Are the Fall Out Boys of the world paying attention? I hope so.

But my personal favorite - and maybe it's because I'm a sick fuck - is this one:

20. Bob Ezrin, who produced Lou Reed’s Berlin, got the anguished children’s cries you hear on “The Kids” by telling his own children their mother was dead and recording the sounds they made.

With most of the items on this list you can sort of brush it off and go "Oh, that didn't really happen!" But for some reason I can believe that Ezrin and Reed were sitting around in the studio, shooting poison into their arms and up into their noses, and hankering for a laugh. So why not tell the kids that mommy is dead? I have never heard the song, but you can be sure that I'm going to go download it and then I'm going to laugh at the image of 10 year olds crying their eyes out because I know that Lou Reed was doubled over in laughter in the next room.

And therein lies the beauty of the rock myth. The utter disgust, discomfort, and disapointment that is felt (or at least most people feel) towards stories like these tends to draw the curious consumer closer to... well.. consuming. The next time you you hear "Do you think I'm sexy?" you're not going to be able to shake the idea of Rod Stewart with a tube stuffed down his throat. I never will. But boy, does that song make me wanna shake my ass.

Maybe I'll go buy it on iTunes in *crisp* 256kbs mp3 format. And then I'll perpetuate the myth by sending it, DRM-free, to you too.

Forget celebrities... here are some REAL stars.

Here's a brief post. Just wanted to call your attention to this cool site called Wikisky. It lets you search for things way, way, way up there right from your computer. The universe is fucking huge, man. And looking at it like this really puts things into perspective.

Thanks to Wired Science for pointing it out.

Let's Start A Rock Band

If you suck at playing instruments but always wished to be in a rock band, now you can. The creators of Guitar Hero and Guitar Hero II are coming out with a new game called, you guessed it, Rock Band.

In the game, you and your friends can start up your own virtual band. This includes guitar, the drums, keyboards, lead vocals, and bass guitar. The game will be released on XBox 360 and PlayStation 3. That means, Blue-Ray Disc or whatever it is.

If you want to read more about the article click here.

Bjork: It Sounds Like A Curse Word

Right now, as we speak, the little dumpling from Iceland is working on her next album Volta.

According to Billboard Online, Bjork has taken a different approach thematically and emotionally on this new album. Because Timbaland's production in three songs makes it more so dramatic. I mean, look at Justin Timberlake's Future Sex/Love Sounds. It's riddled with the irony of love and emotional distraught. An album can't survive without Timbaland.

Besides the sweet tunes by Timbaland, Bjork is also working on her lyrical genius. Of course, I don't know the lyrical genius they're describing, but I'm hoping that it's good. I mean, if you're album is going to be emotionally tiring, then there's got to be some sort of lyrical genius otherwise you've got some pretty depressing lyric-less music.

Billboard describes it as thus:

Thematically, "Volta" sways between paranoia, defiance and alienation to love, introspection and hope.

When Bjork says emotional, she means emotional. That description has the feeling of a bi-polar teenager, except more mature. The maturity lies in the fact that Bjork has probably gone through a lot more than some failed high school relationship.

Anyway, the article also includes a tracklisting of her new album. Here it is. Don't try to go off and pirate the songs now. You don't want to be sued.

1. "Earth Intruders"
2. "Wanderlust"
3. "Dull Flame of Desire"
4. "Innocence"
5. "I See Who You Are"
6. "Vertebrae by Vertebrae"
7. "Pnuemonia"
8. "Hope"
9. "Declare Independence"
10. "My Juvenile"

A supplement to Simone's previous post.

I was over at Engadget just now and read this wonderful post about Microsoft making some efforts to limit DRMs in the Zune player. This is very, very big news.

While we can't exactly give Microsoft any kind of credit for being innovative here (after all, they're just going with the flow), I will say that this is a big step in the right direction that Mr. Gates and Co. are taking. A world without DRMs is a prettier world to live in. But you have to laugh at statements like

Consumers have indicated [having DRM free music] is important to them so Zune has been working with a variety of partners to head in this direction

when these sorts of realizations come so late in the game, and only after someone else in the industry does something about it first. It seems hopeful though, so let's keep our fingers crossed.

So if Apple and EMI are going to sell higher audio quality mp3s at a higher price, there might just be a time when the majority of albums will be digital-only releases through stores like iTunes. DRMs and shitty 128kbs mp3s made all digital releases sound like a horrible idea to me in the past. But now I am not so sure. Thewayofthefuture. Thewayofthefuture. Thewayofthefuture.

And to answer your question, Simone... sure you've got your Lars Ulrich(es) but you also have your David Byrne(s) too.

Holy Cow: Spin Magazine Got Some News

In SPIN news, EMI and Apple iTunes are teaming up bring the masses copyright-free music.

Do you know what that means? It means you can share! Instead of having to authorize computers to listen to the music, digital rights mangement (DRM) is completely gone. Of course, this makes the individual songs a little more expensive, but if you and your friends get together and put some change together, you can share a song.

How funny that a post before I just wrote about Trent Reznor promoting his new album by releasing mp3s for fans to download for free? Now the world is going to be able to share music to each other through iTunes and they won't have that little prompt to tell them they can't. Good job, Apple.

I wonder what the artists will think about this, since they're not benefiting from this. They're probably downloading and sharing their favorite music too. They're humans, after all.

Trent Reznor's Gonna Make it Happen

According to Billboard Online, Trent Reznor has been leaking music from his newest album Year Zero through various websites, flash drives in men's bathrooms, and secret messages sent out to the fans. Of course, this is old news. If you're one of those crazy hardcore NIN fans, then you've known for quite some time that Reznor has been leaking his own music online.

I guess he's a big supporter of pirating music. Then again, this is Trent Reznor. If anyone is going to fight the system, it's going to be him. After years of living an unstable lifestyle, I think Reznor has finally gotten his head screwed on right. He's definitely no Lars Ulrich and fight against the demonic music traders, but he's probably got some fancy training in publicity.

Not only did Reznor approve of the songs being leaked, but he also thought up the idea of putting flash drives in mens' bathrooms at various concert venues. Think about it, what more would you want than a stick of memory while you're taking a piss in an arena-size urinal? The clever frontman can do it all.

And this gets me to the topic of the post: piracy. People search endlessly online for leaks of albums that won't release for another month or so. Some people just stumble upon them and grab them that way while others search every possible Google combination of words.

Then there are artists like Trent Reznor who believe that music should be free. Not completely free, but on a song-by-song basis. I think more artists should follow along in his example. Rather than having an entire album release, why not try a song or two. Not even the songs that will eventually become singles, but a random choice off the list. Not only does it gives the fans a taste of the album, it promotes the artist to becoming superstars. See, Lars, pirates are cool (if you didn't get that from those Johnny Depp movies).

When the Rapture Come Out to Play

The Rapture has released a set of tour dates for the Spring/Summer. I took the liberty of only choosing the dates that occur in the United States. All you foreigners can go search for your dates on the website.

4/15, Gainesville, FL (Abbey Road)
4/16, Athens, GA (40 Watt)
4/18, Tampa, FL (USF Sun Dome)
4/19, Hollywood, FL (Seminole Hard Rock Hotel)
4/20, Orlando, FL (UCF Arena)
4/21, Hattiesburg, MS (The Bottling Company)
4/22, Austin, TX (The Backyard)
4/24, Tempe, AZ (Marquee Theatre)
4/25, Las Vegas, NV (House of Blues)
4/28, Indio, CA (Empire Polo Field/Coachella)
4/29, Reno, NV (Club Underground)
4/30, Eugene, OR (WOW Hall)
5/2, Salt Lake City, UT (The Venue)
5/3, Aspen, CO (Belly Up)
5/4, Colorado Springs, CO (The Black Sheep)
5/7, Minneapolis, MN (Fine Line Music Café)
5/8, Madison, WI (Orpheum Theatre)
5/9, Cleveland, OH (House of Blues)
5/10, Sauget, IL (Pop's)
5/15, New Orleans, LA (House of Blues)
5/16, Houston, TX (Warehouse Live)
5/17, Dallas, TX (Granada Theater)
5/21, Philadelphia, PA (Theater of Living Arts)
5/22, Hartford, CT (Webster Theatre)
5/23, Burlington, VT (Higher Ground)
7/27, Berkeley, CA (Greek Theatre) #
7/29, Seattle, WA (WAMU Center) #
7/31, Denver, CO (Red Rocks) #
8/5, Toronto, ON (Arrow Hall) #
8/7, Montreal, QE (Bell Center) #
8/9, New York, NY (Keyspan Park) #


(# w/Daft Punk)



What really blows is that they're playing New York at the end of summer at Keyspan Park. With Daft Punk. Great...

Lily Allen: Because Everything Sounds Funny in Simlish

EA Games came out with a music video of Lily Allen's Smile completely in Simlish. Now if you don't know what Simlish is, then you don't know your video games. it's the language used by the characters in the video game The Sims. This music video, though, takes place in The Sims 2.

It's really funny trying not to understand the lyrics to the Simlish version of this song. I think it involves less headaches. I like the Sim actually looks like Lily Allen. They've got the trade spaghetti strap dress, bangs, and trench coat. I don't know why EA Games would want to release this, but it's funny. The language sounds like a mix of Russian, Polish, Swedish, and any other languag that ends with "ish". Korean-ish?

Ashley Tisdale: Disney's Favorite Pop Star But Not Mine

I have a guilty pleasure: I'm in love with pop music. From time to time, you will probably read about a new pop song. Probably because I'm playing it on repeat on my ipod. I'm not ashamed of my guilty pleasure. I bet everyone's got to love that Beyonce song Irreplaceable. Ever since that came out, I can't stop listening to it.

But today I heard something on the radio that made me want to cry. Not because it's dramatically lulling or heartbreakingly sad, but it was down-right awful.

Let me introduce you to: Ashley Tisdale. Before I even go on with the rest of this post, watch her video.



She looks like a pedophile's dream come true. Sorry for those kid touchers, though. She's 21. Born July 2nd 1985, Ashley Tisdale got her start to popularity on a show called "The Suite Life Of Zack and Cody". She's also made numerous appearances like in the movie "High School Musical," and recorded her first album "Headstrong".

Besides being every adolescent and full grown adult male's dreams, Ashley Tisdale lacks the fervor to be any good. She's got the string of hits and everyone can watch her on TRL, but she doesn't have the gumption to become a part of my regular repetoire of pop singles. Trust me, I have a lot of pop singles too. From Omarion to Fergie, I've listened to them all. Each one has some sort of savoury bit that keeps me listening, but Ashley's got nothing on me.

It's not her bubble-gum personality or my envy for her good looks. Her voice is so-so, but all her notes are predictable. Even the bridge is too poppy. For a song about a desperate girl who wants to be treated fairly, Ashley exudes too much sexy and not enough anger. Well, I don't think you can call it sexy either. She's wearing sneakers for crying out loud. Besides, this is the Disney Channel. People don't look like this on the Disney Channel. I mean, what other reason is there for Disney to get rid of Hilary Duff?

Quit complaining, Guantanamo Bay is a resort!

Monty Python comedian Terry Jones wrote this fantastic opinion piece in the Guardian on the capture of British naval officers by Iran. [Thanks to Crooks and Liars for pointing it out.]

Here is a highlight:

The true mark of a civilised country is that it doesn't rush into charging people whom it has arbitrarily arrested in places it's just invaded. The inmates of Guantánamo, for example, have been enjoying all the privacy they want for almost five years, and the first inmate has only just been charged. What a contrast to the disgraceful Iranian rush to parade their captives before the cameras!

That's the spirit! What we really ought to do is start detaining prisoners at Disney World. We can make them dress as characters and undergo horrible tortures like this poor bastard: The happiest place on earth, indeed! Not only would the prisoners be forced to think about their crime, which more often than not is simply being Muslim, but the terror-ists would have to chew on some good old fashioned A-merican values. Because it really is all about values - and Jones raises this in the closing of his article:

As Stephen Glover pointed out in the Daily Mail, perhaps it would not be right to bomb Iran in retaliation for the humiliation of our servicemen, but clearly the Iranian people must be made to suffer - whether by beefing up sanctions, as the Mail suggests, or simply by getting President Bush to hurry up and invade, as he intends to anyway, and bring democracy and western values to the country, as he has in Iraq.

Beautifully put. A+. You win, Terry Jones!

Well, at least somebody is winning something these days.